12 Aug

Shit!! I couldn't sleep for two days already!!
Keep staring at the wall and thinking of nothing but all of you.
Worried about my expenses.. Missing the past...
I just couldn't sleep even I have closed my eyes lying on my bed for whole night.

School reopen next week and I kinda like still in NO-MOOD..
Sigh... I wish I can start all over again one day.
I am not regretting to be here alone, it just making me so DOWN sometimes.
You are a freak, you had no one..
You can't have normal life, healthy food..
No pleasures...

The only thing in my mind is getting a JOB.
I can spend money if I had income.
I can go shopping and buy anything I want.
I can eat rice and delicious food instead of instant noodles..

Now is like all the money and numbers are all in my mind and I can't even stop thinking.
I thought if I get good results and maybe I can transfer to a better University but it seems the budget is ONLY that much.. and I will have to pay my own extras..
Try hard to get GPA 4 and then transfer out 2 years later or what??

Dear friends, I wish I could be with you guys.
No worries, no expenses problem, no FOOD problem.
Just get a degree and WORK.

Whatever!
I HATE myself now!!